Hulkamaniacs and Bloody Gloves

Ok so everybody knows who Hulk Hogan is: arguably the most famous and recognizable professional wrestler of all time, with a career spanning over 30 years. Though, for those of you who don't know, he's the guy who bodyslammed Andre the Giant. With such an iconic status, I'm sure one could guess that the man is rolling in money (ballin' if you will). Apart from the Hulkster himself, many of you may know something about his family as a result of their VH1 show Hogan Knows Best which followed those loveable Hogans throughout their everyday lives (think the Osbournes without all of the unintelligible conversation and substance abuse). What some of you may not know is that Mr. and Mrs. Hogan have split up, and it hast NOT been amicable. This saga was one of the issues discussed in his recent interview with, the just as iconic, Rolling Stone magazine. Typically in a divorce there's some beef, but it's not always justified. In this case, however, Hulk had some legitimate reasons to be bitter mainly based around the fact that, in his own words, "You live half a mile from the 20,000-square-foot home you can't go to anymore, you're driving through downtown Clearwater and see a 19-year-old boy driving your Escalade, and you know that a 19-year-old boy is sleeping in your bed, with your wife ..." I would assume that anyone can see why having your ex-wife living in YOUR mansion and spending YOUR money and sharing it all with a 19 year old (she's 49, by the way) would be extremely frustrating; infuriating, even. Unfortunately, it took Hogan about 2 seconds to put his foot in his mouth and turn a sympathetic situation into a major wtf moment when he (in the interview with the major publication/on the record/in all seriousness) went on to say "I totally understand O.J. I get it." Now, don't be too quick to demonize this mountain of a man, because lest we forget, we can let only he who hath not contemplated murdering an ex-lover cast the first stone ... wait ... that doesn't really achieve the same affect in this situation, does it? Now, I'm really not throwing him under the bus here, because I could only imagine how angry that situation would make me, and I'm pretty sure everyone, in the heat of the moment, has said something to that affect but obviously not meant it. To me, the main issue here is that HE SAID IT ON THE RECORD ... That's the kind of thing you say among friends when you're angry (but probably not). Oh well. If nothing else, he's earned himself a nice mimosas-and-waffles brunch with Orenthal James to discuss the pros and cons of murdering your white wife. Though we should probably hope that doesn't happen, because I'm not completely sure the world's ready to see Hulkamania runnin' wild AND the Juice on the loose.

Gift Baskets Gone Wrong

If you're a journalist that covers any kind of media (music, movies, video games, etc.) you can expect to receive some promotional items from companies trying to hype the release of their new products. If you're a video game reviewer, however, EA may have just inadvertently turned you into a criminal (seriously). EA recently released The Godfather II the second game in their Godfather series based on the classic film series of the same name. Among other special items a character receives as he progresses through the game is a set of brass knuckles: an item which EA decided they would include in the promotional gift basket of sorts that they sent out to some reviewers. Ignoring how ridiculous it is, it was kind of a boss idea, definitely cooler than the norm, however it's obvious after this that EA's entire legal department (and common sense) was on vacation because no one caught the fact that BRASS KNUCKLES ARE ILLEGAL WEAPONS in most US States. Now, to EA's credit, once they realized their egregious error, they alerted those who had received the packages and encouraged all of them to simply return the packages immediately, to eliminate any possible legal repercussions. While it was good of EA to try to correct their mistake and keep all of those dutiful video game reviewers in the clear, the question still remains: how could it not occur to ANYONE that sending out brass knuckles may not be the best idea? The only downside to this whole (Lupe) fiasco is that now receiving a Tommy Gun is probably out of the question.

The Short Bus

People are idiots. We know this. Sometimes the world needs to sacrifice a few morons to achieve a "supreme race" capable of thought. (No, not aryans, just intelligent people, me no goose step) I've always kind of had a feeling that animals at the zoo are just waiting to get their revenge on the over-weight tourist yuppies staring at them at all hours of the day. This weekend one very lucky polar bear got his revenge.

In Berlin (see, now the nazi joke makes sense) this weekend a woman thought a swim with the polar bear world's version of a diva would be a fabulous idea. After hopping the fence into the polar bear moat, during feeding time no less, she was greeted by Knut. Knut is Germany's new star bear. In December 2006, Knut became the first polar bear to be born in Berlin in over 30 years. Unfortunately, being all alone, he never really learned his manners. When he saw the woman approaching in the moat he got a bit testy. Knut proceeded to bite the woman several times making her the equivalent of a human chew toy. What a shock.

(Un?)luckily, rescuers were able to pull the woman out of the water before any life threatening damage was done. Not only does she now have scars from the most famous polar bear in all the land, she was also issued a citation for jumping the fence in the first place. Leave it to the man to kick you when you're down. Let this be a lesson to all you crazy kids out there, stop being stupid and messing with animals. They don't like you.

Peace & Love