The Short Bus

People are idiots. We know this. Sometimes the world needs to sacrifice a few morons to achieve a "supreme race" capable of thought. (No, not aryans, just intelligent people, me no goose step) I've always kind of had a feeling that animals at the zoo are just waiting to get their revenge on the over-weight tourist yuppies staring at them at all hours of the day. This weekend one very lucky polar bear got his revenge.

In Berlin (see, now the nazi joke makes sense) this weekend a woman thought a swim with the polar bear world's version of a diva would be a fabulous idea. After hopping the fence into the polar bear moat, during feeding time no less, she was greeted by Knut. Knut is Germany's new star bear. In December 2006, Knut became the first polar bear to be born in Berlin in over 30 years. Unfortunately, being all alone, he never really learned his manners. When he saw the woman approaching in the moat he got a bit testy. Knut proceeded to bite the woman several times making her the equivalent of a human chew toy. What a shock.

(Un?)luckily, rescuers were able to pull the woman out of the water before any life threatening damage was done. Not only does she now have scars from the most famous polar bear in all the land, she was also issued a citation for jumping the fence in the first place. Leave it to the man to kick you when you're down. Let this be a lesson to all you crazy kids out there, stop being stupid and messing with animals. They don't like you.

Peace & Love